Wednesday 11 May 2011

Going to the doctor's.

The last time that I paid a visit to a doctor in this country must have been about 30 years ago.  I've registered with a surgery here and have already had to pay a visit to the rather simple building that appears to be older than it actually is.  I was to be seen by a doctor who, whenever he called out for his next patient, could never remember which room he was in, much to the patients' in the waiting room amusement.

By the time he had called me in to his room I was in front of his door when he finally added ".......room 6" over the intercom.  I was greeted by Dr Kapoor, a short man with an incredibly shiny, bald head, from somewhere in south Asia.  After a few questions, I was asked if I minded if Dr Kapoor touched my stomach.  Well, if a doctor needs to poke my stomach to give me a diagnosis, then I'm used to them going ahead and doing it.  So I jumped up on the bed and waited to be prodded.

"Would you mind lifting up your shirt, please?"

Ah, yes, this doctor has lovely manners.

"Would you mind undoing your belt, please?"

This is just weird.  Just poke and prod me, will you - they all do in Belgium.

I was then asked if I would mind peeing into the tiniest pee-pot that I had ever seen, yet managed perfectly without peeing all over my fingers.  Dr Kapoor tested the sample and prescribed me some pills and I feel reassured to tell you that I am not pregnant.

7 comments:

Richard said...

Welcome to civilisation. That was the largest pot I've ever seen given to anyone to pee into. You may need to improve your aim in future.

Debster said...

Are you sure he was a real doctor and not some sort of pervert?

Anonymous said...

next time the doctor asking if you mind.... Just say, actually, I do, pause a bit, then say, ahh Joking.... see what happens....
It freaks them out....

neena maiya (guyana gyal) said...

When I go to the doc, I have to tell myself, I'm just another body, they've seen hundreds, thousands.

It's a good thing you're not pregnant, you'd be prodded and poked for the next 9, 10, 11, 12 months. Or more.

WrathofDawn said...

Ye gods, woman. You just got the first lot raised up. Don't start that all over.

Unless you want to, in which case, have at it.

I'd rather gnaw off my own foot. I love the demon spawn I have, but been there, done that, worn the spit-up.

Hope all is going well!

Z said...

I was a bit startled when I was having an operation last year, to be given a pregnancy test. It's standard in pre-menopausal women, even if they are well into their fifties, apparently.

Henry North London 2.0 said...

I see you met another Dr Kapoor...Just wait til you meet me in the flesh...

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